A Theory of Human Motivation (abridged)

Love me , Love thyself (often)


Abraham Maslows "famous" and oft discussed ( seriously I got stuck in a pub between two plum gobblers lapping this up like it was Jesus's dribbling love nectar ) hierarchy of human needs states in a rather crude and shortsighted way that as humans meet basic needs they will move on to higher needs until reaching self actualization - well duh!!

Nobody said it better than Frederick Herzberg who was often heard shouting in the Lamb & Flag pub in Droitwich on Sunday lunchtimes " Maslow can chew on my wrinkly fat bum grapes if he thinks even the most severly lobotomized crack addict would wipe the crusty residue from their fetid arsehole on any of his fictional crazings." He has also been quoted saying as " Maslow is a woofter and I could easily have him and his mates in a fight, one at a time or all together."

Maslow himself has been keeping a suspiciously low profile and when chased for comment on his contentious work was "unavailable." He was last sighted at a spot he had discovered which he said was the perfect size to rest his enormous bloated head - his own arse , which he promptly disappeared up.